sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Randomize
