I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize