this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
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