i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Is it because I queefed?
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
