My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize