Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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