i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize