check it out our google latitudes are spooning
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Randomize