Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Randomize
