Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
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