Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
