so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Randomize
