Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
