why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize
