I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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