I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
