butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Randomize
