the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Randomize
