All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
