the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I am available for nakedness
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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