Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Randomize
