so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
