i need an iv and a liver transplant
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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