dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Randomize
