Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
