Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize
