Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
