Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
