Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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