Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
