Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
