sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Randomize
