he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
