omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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