i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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