I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
