Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
Randomize
