I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
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