So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
