More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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