the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
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