haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Randomize
