Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
