you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
