Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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