I love black thongs
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize