If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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