I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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