Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
