so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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